I debated writing a blog about the trials, when the pain is still so fresh. This may mean for a bit of an emotional one, but after all of the texts and messages I got from everyone, I feel I owe it to you all. I would like to make it EXTREMELY clear to everyone how much their comments, both hopeful then sympathizing have meant to me.
To be completely honest, I felt heartbroken. Four years of blood, sweat, sacrifices, and (lots of) tears. It would be easy to get completely lost in the disappointment. But you all have been my constant reminders that pole vault is what I do. . . NOT who I am. And I will never forget that the sacrifices were not all mine. I was able to go after my goals because of the help of so many people. Some gave unreal amounts of money, others more than I could have hoped for. It is hard to not feel like I let people down, but again your messages show me otherwise. Given a couple of days, I will set out for my next goals in life. If there is one thing my parents and family has taught me, is that the only person that can keep you down is yourself. I refuse to give up on my dreams. Sure those dreams may change and grow, but I know I am being the best I can be when I am working toward something meaningful.
It didn't take me long to realize that I am not done reaching for my pole vault goals. I understand that it would be easiest to quit now, but I have never been one for taking the easy road. I have so much more to give, and with only 9 weeks to come back from a second surgery I was able to make vast improvements. I truly believed I could make the comeback, and every single day I worked like I was already on the Olympic Team. I did not have one moment in all of that time where I didn't give it 100% in every workout. I HAVE ZERO REGRETS. God just has a little different plans for me than I had for myself.
I am ok, I am a strong woman full of faith, who has found I have more support than I ever could have dreamed of. Pole vault has given me a platform on which I have been able to help and inspire people, and what more could you ask for in life. When I say that I have so much more to give in the pole vault, I don't mean just jumping. I want to be able to share my experiences with others. To emphasize to our youth that hard work takes you as far as you want to go. If I gave up now, I wouldn't be following my own advice. I want to wear the Red, White, & Blue as I stand on the runway representing the United States. And there is at least one possibility within every year to do so. My next goal will be to make the US World Championship Team in Moskva, Russia August 2013.
